Brutal Honesty
A good friend of mine. The MELSINORE as shown here….
Thought I should conduct an experiment. An experiment so out there and so off the wall that it just might work. It’s called…..being honest with women. I know, it sounds pretty far fetched but I decided to give it a shot. See, the MELSINORE is one of the few people on this planet I like and respect and if she thinks it’s a good idea it just might be.
So here is the story of one of my first attempts at brutal honesty. There was this chick that was begging me to go and have a drink with her. I kept putting her off because I just wasn’t feeling it really and I thought she was kind of a good girl and it wouldn’t end up where I wanted it to. I made up the myriad of excuses to not go have a drink with her but one night she was exceptionally persistent. All the while I am making excuses I’m thinking in my head. “Ok, if you go out with her you won’t have one drink, you’ll have ten drinks. After the ten drinks you’ll get horny and want some ass. After you decide you want some ass you’ll then start lying to her and make her fall in love with you or make her think you actually like her and that you might actually talk to her the following day. Then you’ll just be hung over and have to actively avoid this girl for a week or more until she gets the hint.” Not worth it I thought.
Then it hit me like a ton of bricks….let’s try the experiment. So I did just that, I told her just like I had been thinking it. I said look, “Here’s the map of the evening if I go and have a drink with you. I’m not going to have one drink I’m going to have ten drinks because that’s how I roll. After those ten drinks I’m going to get horny and then want to have sex with you. That’s normally where the lying would come in. I would lie to you to get you to like me and sleep with me and then I’ll most likely rock your world for one night and one night only. No offense, I just don’t watch movies more than once. After that I’ll avoid you for a week until you realize I really had little more interest than a one night stand with you. I’m telling you this in an attempt to avoid the whole middle part and get right to the good stuff. I’ll understand if you want to call off the drink.”
Either way I win right? Well much to my surprise she paused for a minute and then said….”I can live with that.” What a total score!!! So the night pretty much went as I described. I thought the part where I had to avoid her wouldn’t happen since I told her I was going to but it did anyway. Maybe she thought I was kidding, maybe she liked the badboy in me, hell I don’t know…. I haven’t talked to her since but it sure saved me a lot of lying and time that night.
So I guess the experiment was a partial success, thanks MELSINORE. Oh, and she was a freak by the way, I guess the whole good girl stereotype was way off. I guess the moral of the story is you can’t judge a book by it’s cover….that’s as good of a moral as any I guess.
