You can’t complement anyone anymore.

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I just had to share this with everyone as I was really kind of hurt by the inability to pay anyone a sincere complement anymore.  I shared it on my facebook and people thought it was hilarious.  I found the humor in it after they pointed it out but at first I was really kind of put off that you just can’t complement anyone anymore.  And what is funny about this little snippit of a story is that it is absolutely true and it was AWESOME!!

Ok, so I’m standing there at the urinal at the Atlanta airport.  I pull into my parking space beside some random dude.  As guy code would have it I looked straight ahead and motionless.  If you’re a guy you know what I’m talking about.  You basically have to act like the guy beside you is Medusa and if you happen to look his way you’ll surely turn to stone right there in place with your junk in your hand.

So there I am, standing beside him enjoying the sweet release of pissing and he begins to let out a very audible fart.  Well the first ten seconds were pretty amusing but after the 15 second mark it actually started to become quite impressive.  I swear to God that this man let out one continuous, non-stop, VERY LOUD AND STEADY fart that was truly remarkable.  He farted the entire time I pissed and I swear to god that it was at least 60 seconds non-stop.  I mean…. that is fucking amazing right?!  So when he finally finished and let out the finishing squeak I sincerely said to him while still looking straight forward “Nice Work!!!  I’ll call Guiness”

I thought we would have a nice little man laugh at his amazing flatulence accomplishment but what did I get in return?  He told me to fuck off.  It just goes to show you that you can’t be nice to anyone and don’t even think about paying a sincere complement to anyone in this day and age.

I don’t care though, that magical moment of the one minute fart will forever be in my mind even if he did tell me to fuck off.

Even his nasty comment won’t take away the joy in my heart that the amazing feat of flatulence brought me.

That’s it, just thought I would share…..

WARDINATOR…..out.